Inadvertently, I found my way into thinking about my goals for an emotional life. I think these are going to be more esoteric than pragmatic. Less about concrete benchmarks and more about being. So here they are, my goals for an emotional life.
Be emotionally aware: I think I’m mostly aware of my mood, especially how I express it externally. Being aware of the emotions that drive that mood will help me both be in the moment and keep me from letting the little frustrations build.
Be emotionally authentic: Just emote. It isn’t something I’m good at. This is why it is a goal. I’m introspective enough to generally understand my emotions and their root causes, but often I find my stoicism tends to tamp them down. This doesn’t mean I’m going to suddenly become a raging ball of emotive fury. What I think it means is to allow myself the space for an emotional response. Emotional authenticity is also about doing what feels appropriate for me. It very likely will be more internal than external, but that is OK.
Be emotionally available: While often this is taken as being more supportive, what I mean is that I need to clue in those around me about my emotional state. Emotion is personal to me. I’m not a big sharer. But allowing other in, particularly those I love, will help me communicate better and help them by giving a bit of additional understanding.
Find appropriate emotional outlets: As an internal emotive I tend to eat a lot of feelings, both literally and figuratively. Cheeseburgers don’t solve emotional problems. I think what this will be will be writing. It doesn’t have to be posted or read by other, but for me often just the idea of putting ink on paper (or text on a screen) helps me sort out complex feeling and alleviates the pressure that can build up from daily life.
I’m sure there will be more to add here but I think if I can be mindful of these emotional goals, I will have a pretty good emotional life.