So first the baby watch update. If you bet on today (evidently there is a pool) you lost. Sara felt a little tired but overall was pretty good. The baby laundry is done, but still in the drier in the basement so that I’m not yet ready to tempt fate. Fate is coming. I just want it to be on time. Every time my office phone rings I think “is this it”. But so far just someone looking for a little information. What today was, however, was a bad day for Jason. Not physically. I didn’t break my arm falling out of a boat. It was more of electronically induced bad day. It didn’t start out bad, it just got that way. Everything was going swimmingly until I fell victim to my own productivity. I was making good progress on a manuscript that I’ve been working on for a while. I got in a groove. And I thought I saved. But I guess I didn’t. Something happened at about 3PM and the whole program shut down and the file disappeared. It wasn’t like it had a failure and left a partially saved document, it was all gone. I was so angry. I’m not good at being angry. I want to yell and scream and break things but I also live in the world and in an office so I just steamed in my own juices for a while. I tried to figure it out and find it and fix it but no dice. Shit. So I still had other drafts that I had saved earlier in the morning but 6 good hours of work was gone. So I had to leave work a few minutes early. My thought was to drive around and cool down. It wasn’t anyone’s fault. There is no one to yell at. It is just anger with no direction. So I thought I would leave and get some late lunch, perhaps at the new Chipotle. Unfortunately when I arrived the line was still out the door. Double shit. Lost work and now no damn delicious burrito. I guess I could have stood in line, because that is what you want to do when you are angry… stand in a line with strangers for an hour for a burrito. So I did the next worst thing I could think of, I got a haircut. Some of you know how much I hate haircuts. I almost never go the same place twice because I am never happy and a new person doesn’t build up animosity. If I could I would never cut my hair. I would let it grow, but I get to looking quite shaggy. My hair gets to an annoying length and stays there for a while before it gets to a length that is manageable. So I went into Sports Clips to de-shag. There is a long and complex story about why I hate haircuts. So I got a haircut to redirect my anger. I wasn’t mean to the lady (who was by all accounts a skilled and capable hairstylist). The redirection is more abstract. I could be mad at the idea of a haircut. For some reason something tangible makes it better. That and cookies. I leave you with a few picture of my lost hair.
Just as an added note. This wasn’t really that bad a day. No one I love was hurt or sad or sick or in trouble. Yes, my computer crashed and ruined some work, but that work came from my head, so ultimately it is still there I just have to redo it a little. In terms of actual bad days this one doesn’t make the cut. That isn’t to say I wasn’t mad or frustrated, but sometimes taking a deep breath and a good sleep lets you put everything into better perspective.